Work and Home with Sean & Sasha

Babyface vs Teddy Riley: A Masterclass in Failure

April 30, 2020 Season 1 Episode 3
Work and Home with Sean & Sasha
Babyface vs Teddy Riley: A Masterclass in Failure
Show Notes Transcript

Sean and Sasha use the Babyface vs Teddy Riley battle as a lens to discuss failure as feedback. Once again, Sasha is appalled by Sean's inability to rest on his day off. Sean questions Sasha's infatuation with Babyface and tries to get her to do calculus.

In this episode Sean and Sasha tell us who they are: academic and professional backgrounds and how music brought them together.

spk_1:   0:00
Hey, everyone, welcome to another episode of work and home. I am Sean

spk_0:   0:04
and I am Sasha,

spk_1:   0:06
and we're very excited to be talking with you again. So excited. So we've launched our first episode. We've gotten some amazing feedback from our friends and family so far.

spk_0:   0:20
Uh, I mean, honestly, talking about the highs and lows that that's been one of the highs, just like we have great friends and we have a lot of mutual friends. But you know, Sean, you always talk about this thing. Don't be hampered by fair. Just do the do. The thing is like I am the kind of person like, Oh my God, I Googled too much. I, uh But you were just like, No, we're just gonna do the thing. And lengthy response has just been so overwhelmingly positive. And, like we've gotten some good critiques, I'm going to try to that way. Well, whatever. But one of the highlights I want to share with you is that my friends have been like referencing the podcast in our conversations because they think it's say they listened, but they listen, is yeah,

spk_1:   1:16
it's one thing for someone to say they have done something. But then to try to incorporate some of the lessons into their life is it's it's a bit over overwhelming. It's positive on and validating Yes, which is funny enough. Like what We weren't we didn't start this off thinking, OK, we need to be evaluated. It felt like more like Okay, let's share our experience. That's document what we're going through. Maybe it's a value to someone else, but we've gotten some very positive feedback. Yeah, so one and one of the things that I want to be your friends pointed out and shot out by saving him. So I give a specific

spk_0:   1:55
If it's positive, Let's say their names Mike Night.

spk_1:   2:00
And he mentioned that, you know, we should introduce ourselves like, Who are we on? And Soro viewers have, Ah, listeners have a better understanding local where were coming from? When a while we do all of this. And by the time you hear this podcast, it would be number three Justin Keys. I don't know if that matters todo so I was thinking about my speed back and wondering, OK, what will be my elevator pitch description of myself to someone and it's kind of hard to summarize your entire, like, you know, 20 something years of my life.

spk_0:   2:39
20 0 OK,

spk_1:   2:45
now, now you see. Now everybody go.

spk_0:   2:46
No, no. You are a smooth 27. A smooth

spk_1:   2:51
OK, thank you. Thank you, Sachin. So who am I? Who is Sean? Born and raised Internet Tobago moved to New York City in 2004 for college, which is where I met Sasha. So we've been friends for 15 years. 15 years? I came to New York in 2000 for Sasha came to Columbia in 2005. Eso I studied and you've heard me references already. Engineering, electric engineering. Did my undergrad masters and PhD at Columbia in engineering. But I'm not working in engineering e. I work in education. A recent side of new role, where I'm doing curriculum development for on artificial intelligence education. Start up that focuses on diversity and inclusion in the A i. C s space. So credible work. I enjoy it. I really enjoy the team I'm working with over the last, like, 78 years of develop this passion for education, particularly for black and round students. And that's informed a lot by my experience at Columbia being one of the few black people in engineering on. And that number goes, some of black people in a Jane drops significantly as you go from bachelor. So master's PhD. So just being aware of off of that trajectory and just understanding the value in kids seeing someone like me in front of them who looks like looks like them also drives my work within education. So that's my, like, 95. Sort of. Also, my side,

spk_0:   4:47
my side hostile inside.

spk_1:   4:52
So I have I have this blawg, my body, my kitchen, which I love. And to thank you actually to mate eso Sasha. Thanks. And this is the first to me. Sasha cooked something. One of my recipes from the Blawg. Yes, and fed it to me.

spk_0:   5:12
I did. I did get some things wrong because of course I would. But it was No. But I have to say that it was so easy to make a really good delicious dish. So thank you. You're welcome. Truly made yourself dinner tonight. I e did

spk_1:   5:28
not. I feel like I ate myself, but that sounds really were I But I thoroughly enjoyed the meal, but I I started my body, my kitchen, like back in 2005 and it was a way for me to share these recipes. I haven't had my mind. It's grown. It's a bit more than that now, where I'm trying to empower my readers to take control their health, control the kitchens, and I try to focus on understanding food and nutrition and not so much telling people what to do. So at the end of the day, I will love for my my readers to know how to tweak things to fit their lifestyle and understand, like how other aspects of their lives affect their nutrition and fitness and mental health choices. So that's that's kind of my my little elevator pitch, which is more than two minutes and pretty sure

spk_0:   6:25
keep us honest,

spk_1:   6:27
might keep us honest. So, Sasha, if you want to introduce yourself to someone in an elevator,

spk_0:   6:33
uh, eso I am. Sasha was born in the Bronx, Um, raising Mount Vernon. God love me a little bit more than he did Sean and made me Jamaican. Oh, no, thank God. I love it and met Sean in 2005. When I started college, we sang together. We were in an over in an a cappella group together. And, you know, I was thinking earlier this week how much I kind of like followed in Shawn's footsteps because he was just a year above me. And he at one point was co lead for our cappella group and then also the director for the Gospel Choir on our campus. And the next year, I also assumed both physicians s Oh, yeah, I've been inspired by you. Like, uh, currently work in tech. Yeah. Oh, uh, it's it's great. I'm more on the business side. I'm not an engineer as you. Hopefully you guys learn from last episode what? I was trying to talk about widgets, widgets and patching them together. Um, see, I don't know any of that stuff, but I do You want to talk about you and how the education thing is, like, clearly a through line in your like the work that you dio and I really have an appreciation for you because I think often times I think about people what to do The PhD thing, and sometimes, like, I just feel like a lot of that learning does not come back to the masses and the fact that you are so passionate about making, like, artificial intelligence more accessible and then also, like, health and wellness more accessible. Like you really want to bring the information to the masses. And he brought it to me tonight in that recipe. Thank you, but no. Seriously, that's amazing. And it was. And it was also amazing to be able to sing and make music with you.

spk_1:   8:28
Yeah. So what was the question?

spk_0:   8:31
Um, was there a question? No, I just Sean, are you great? Your great Thank

spk_1:   8:39
you, Sasha. I do. I do have a passion medication. I guess that my approach to informing people goes back to love the work. I did actress college at Columbia and learning how education works and not necessarily in a classroom. But I hope people learn I worked in so many schools in New York City, but working with some of some amazing teachers, educators, administrators, seeing you know what it means to provide quality education in spite of all the challenges that really helps. Helps me know when I write something for my blawg. When I know when I'm designing all these ai courses, it's informed by those experiences. E really can't claim that as, like, inherent

spk_0:   9:27
it is inherent, Sean

spk_1:   9:29
know that? Not at all. But thank you.

spk_0:   9:34
Oh, no. But thank you. Because, you know, I get to benefit from that. That today Shawn tried to make me deuce. Calculus e r. A very theoretical way. But like, even in the moment, I was like, Oh, um, differentiation and curb. But when you broke it down, it's like they like the elements. Like the fundamental things about calculus. I was like, Yes, I do. I do know these things. You know,

spk_1:   10:05
those things on, like, three equations can be scary, but at the same time, that's my goal is not to get you, you know, memorizing the equations. I want you to understand the intuition behind things, and then you could apply that in other ways. And if you want to, you learn more about the actually equations and stuff, Um, uh, s so we don't We don't have calculus in common, but way do have music in common, which is, I think, a common theme through many of our experiences of your last 15 years on. And we got a couple requests from friends to sing. We're not gonna sing. No, no. At least not now. Maybe maybe later. But we did share a musically experienced this week.

spk_0:   10:56
Oh, and also want

spk_1:   10:59
tonight to with the BTO performance way Won't touch that one yet. What? We're gonna touch the other one? I don't know if you guys have been paying attention, Teoh Missile Instagram live battles thing. But this week there was a battle between Baby Face and Teddy Riley. I school versus right. Do it. Can you explain what Vs is really and like, how did this even come to be? Why is it why is it such a big part of the whole working from home? Experience many people right now

spk_0:   11:37
based on what I know and I'm sure people out there no more. But Swiss beats and Timberland came together. I don't know, versus existed before Cove it and they just pivoted for this. But the idea based on what I've seen them say, is about educating people about truly. This is so important to me. But educating people about the history of black music and like the catalogues that are out there and making it accessible to people so I don't I don't know how versus will continue after this because I think they had four million views I can imagine the temptation to monetize that is probably very rial. I think the fact that it was free and accessible allowed us all to engage and learn things.

spk_1:   12:24
Yeah. So, Baby Face and Teddy rally there were third battle, maybe. Of I mean,

spk_0:   12:31
it may have been because we thought this battle this

spk_1:   12:39
battle special for so many reasons. Many and I, this second iteration of it had me thinking a lot about some of these, like some bigger lessons that could be learned or discussed. But before we get to the lessons What what were your thoughts on the battle fashion like, Why? Why did we watch this thing to begin with?

spk_0:   13:06
Because, you know, and again, juice with speeds and Timberlands credit thes are giants in the music industry, but also, like in black music culture who have contributed so much again going back to the education piece. It's important for new music makers coming up to see that I get that. Um,

spk_1:   13:27
we've come. That's all you get.

spk_0:   13:32
I was ready. I am not saying but the class so that yes, it was like just these two huge music makers. Huge catalogs, baby face. My God, he just has written so much Teddy Riley He invented like, ah, the new jack swing And like, you know, these air like monumental pillars in, like, black music. So, yes, but the mess was great. So much of myth.

spk_1:   14:06
So if if you're familiar with the battles situation up until Teddy shouldn't show up on scene most people kept it a really simple, so simple, so simple with this set up, right,

spk_0:   14:21
Dolo in the studio,

spk_1:   14:23
Baby face. You know, he he came to the battle with justice headphones and you know, his $5 billion studio in the background, whatever it was just him and his, you know, his music. Teddy had like, 15 people in this room with them for the first time, the first time he had had a good drummer, the drummers like brow wiper hot audio engineer, some random lady who we never really saw, but heard. And I think it's safe to see that it failed.

spk_0:   15:04
It failed and it in its intent. But it succeeded in bringing us bountiful joy. Eso 18 games. It was the gift that kept on giving. I left all night, then woke up the next morning and walked last all morning because it was just like what was happening. Also interview her. But Teddy was like, Yeah, my family flew out here. Sir, do you understand what's happening?

spk_1:   15:31
Why did they throughout filed there? They can hear anything. It was it was just frustrating to see to see, you know, these two, these two giants online and then we can't really enjoy the actual music that they're creating. We I mean, we were about to hear baby faces music? Yes, he was appeared. But Teddy's not so much so that first round failed. Then they were like, Oh, you know, we're gonna come back in a few days and do it again. They came back the second time Waas a bit better.

spk_0:   16:07
Yes, it was a week. The battle could actually happen. Teddy was, well, kind of by himself. I mean, is people coming in out the room? He was going in, not the rule. For him, going another room was really funny because he always seemed to be leaving when Babyface was playing and it was just like Now you have to stay here and it's just so disrespectful. And it was also funny to see baby phase looking into the camera like, Where's Teddy? Pity Are you here? Just I mean, it was pure comedy, but at least they were able tohave have the battle this side and I'm partial to baby phase. Um but they both They're both giants.

spk_1:   16:51
I have been calling him Shady Face.

spk_0:   16:54
Oh, yes,

spk_1:   16:55
after the thieves last two battles. But so one of as I watch the second battle and again it was not It still wasn't completely smooth. I can't help but notice the improvement that that that Teddy that teddy showed also even baby face even though like he really didn't have mushroom improve on like his his background set up was different. He had his candles. He had his Grammys on the first round. He was just like I know it looks like I won't say for dramas, but he just, like, showed up like let's do this 2nd 2nd time around. He tried a bit harder than lighting was better.

spk_0:   17:41
Lighting was better for sort of

spk_1:   17:42
much. But my mind kept going back to this idea of, you know, using failure as feedback. And I think as a tough pill for many of us to swallow. And it was interesting to see how these two giants handled that first failure in and incorporating that feel year as feedback into this second round. Making sense?

spk_0:   18:10
No, you're totally making sense. And I think there are a lot of lessons to be learned. And we're both, it seems Let me know if I'm wrong. Are partial to be the face. Right team, Baby days. I didn't know chocolate up to being trainee. Oh, but I mean, to be fair, let me call this out because I would not be honest about it if I didn't. I saw Teddy Riley, and that's what what? I saw that first set up. I was like, basically, he did essence quits on him as it was a big Sadio. And I had never heard of guy before because although I was raised here, I was a Christian super strict, but Block could listen to music. Uh, and my friend was just like, What? You mean you don't know? Guy? I'm like, I don't Is that one person? Is it? I don't. Yeah, exactly, because we grew up on him. But but again. But I think that speaks of the fact that people don't know Teddy rally as much. And so he really felt they had something to prove and he wanted to go out. He wanted Teoh give the best show possible. But why? Because he had a lot on the line. And I also believe he had another online platform that he was like promoting on the side. Um, and from what I saw on, I mean, people keep me honest. But from what I saw on Twitter, it seems like the feet hiss feed on his web. Whatever. But Web platform spectacular. Crystal clear sound. Amazing. But again, you can't put all that on Instagram.

spk_1:   19:49
So he did. He didn't prioritize. I guess he didn't prioritize the Instagram experience

spk_0:   19:54
Well, as it

spk_1:   19:55
four million people who were watching

spk_0:   19:58
as an educator and I spent very little time in education. But I just wonder if it was like the instructions that he was given weren't clear or he did not read the instructions or, like, just disregarded. Hm. I just wonder. I

spk_1:   20:12
think a part of it is definitely ignorance. Teoh how it works, overall, on many, many of us, we shoot ourselves in the foot when, when it comes to this kind of stuff, like where we feel like we know how something works. You know, we've had experience in these other areas, but unwilling. Teoh, listen to what other people other was feedback and and then we end up being really screwed. So I find it hard to believe that he didn't like he wasn't

spk_0:   20:40
told. Sound sounds like a teacher. I find it hard to

spk_1:   20:48
believe, because it's been done before. It's been it's been done before and this wasn't the first battle. So you know so and who's who's behind versus

spk_0:   21:00
Oh, no, no, no, I don't I don't know.

spk_1:   21:03
We don't know. But therapy they are people who have a lot more money than we do. And I'm sure they would want Teoh to ensure the success of their their brand. Maybe like, hey, Teddy, this way you got to do you know, get your phone was charged, you know, get some headphones and, you know, have a good time. Look at what these other people did. They had a good time. It was just them that he's like, Nah, you all don't know what you're talking about. I'm not going to take your feedback. I'm gonna do what I want to do because you know, I'm a gangster and yeah, I'm sure exactly that's exactly what Steady, Steady.

spk_0:   21:47
But I also think Teddy said, This is my moment, and I want This is like it's like, seized the day like, do the most. And I think sometimes again to what you were saying, like ignorance, like as people, we can approach a project or problem and not fully understand what it takes to be successful in solving that problem. We're navigating that space and we just do too much. Or sometimes we do two, we don't. We're not equipped to meet the task at hand. Bet you, you know was equipped.

spk_1:   22:16
Baby. Baby craze is ready. So here's life. It worked in babies, faces favor. And you mentioned some of this already. Baby face. He didn't have as much to lose. Right? So you I could see him not being as stressed out at perfecting this like live situation. I think you mentioned this tonight that he spoke. He done similar things to this before. So I think those two things really helped him and looking at, you know, the first battle attempt at the battle with his 2nd 1 He, even though he didn't have much improvement to do, he still improved. He's still improved.

spk_0:   23:02
He didn't like his

spk_1:   23:03
sound was on point the first time. He's his like we could have seen him, you know, whatever. But he still he still took the opportunity to improve. Ah, a bit more from that second round. Teddy, as he said, like he's. He has a lot, maybe a lot more valuable of opportunity for him. A lot, a lot, A lot more at risk for him. And he kinda took the feedback e second. But not because, like that, it's still fell apart, is still far apart on his

spk_0:   23:37
sound. Wasn't great. I love them. The comments were like said he just stopped moving. Don't move, because what? Why are you trying to do way?

spk_1:   23:45
Do you see yourself more as a baby face or a teddy?

spk_0:   23:50
That's a good question, because you know what? I've learned this through work, actually working with different leaders. What I see on top of what you just said the difference between Teddy and be face is that baby faces more mature. And I think also you could argue

spk_1:   24:07
Teddy Riley, please don't come for us.

spk_0:   24:10
Well, in

spk_1:   24:11
tearing face you can find us in Harlem.

spk_0:   24:15
I will give you the rest of, you know, just getting up. Not kidding. DME baby face. I'm kidding, Um, that I But there's a privilege, though, in terms of like Baby Faces catalogue being so big and so heavy He's always on, like in demand. He's always performing teddy stuff. I feel and, like again feel free. To disagree is more almost time bound. New Jack Swing is like a specific kind of sound. I know that his catalogue, you know, was bigger than that. But there is a privilege to someone who's just there, considered classic there, like Canonised. And so he's constantly performing. So his hiss set is straight. And I can say that because I have seen baby face me, myself and a close friend of mine. We used to see him. I think we have seen him at least once or twice together, and we plan to see him more frequently than she got married and and, you know, dumped me. Oh, but no. But like I've seen him in a it's he does it. It's like a plug and play. Oh, I'm in Charleston. Plug and play. So he's used to doing this. And he's so, like, key. So solidified. Teddy Riley is not as solidified. And maybe isn't not as, like, canonize and established within the industry and within the culture. I'm in terms of being like, relevant to now. So I would say that

spk_1:   25:49
all that to say

spk_0:   25:50
all that to say, that I would call myself right now I'm a Teddy Riley hoping to get to a baby phase in that I need more experience, any more more opportunities to try and fail to learn from my mistakes. And then one day I will I will arise from the ashes.

spk_1:   26:09
Has a baby thing

spk_0:   26:10
as a babyface Babyface, please. DME

spk_1:   26:15
So So you are you The goal is to be a baby.

spk_0:   26:19
Yes, I'm currently a Teddy Riley. I mean, who is between 30 Rally and babies. I'm not quite a tidy right leave. I would not in Corona virus quarantine times. I would not show up on camera with 15 people

spk_1:   26:32
No, no. What? Just cause no social distancing. Just know. So I don't know who is between Teddy Riley and Baby Face.

spk_0:   26:40
I don't know. I'm not Even if I tried to say I probably

spk_1:   26:42
I won't Even I would have been trying. I would even try to answer that right now. Okay. No one? No. Do it. It's no. So I keep thinking back. Like, what? What is it about baby pizza that intrigues us so much? And I remember him saying something on the lines off. You know, I don't do remixes, shady piece, and part of I think part from part of that for me is kind of really understanding what it is that you're trying to produce and put out there like the essence of the core. Like, how do I make a timeless thing that doesn't need to be remix and have that song live on forever? There's something about baby faces, approach to music that really goes to the foundation of off music and and communicating emotion that that goes beyond, you know, producing hits. Yeah, you know, it's not just about producing hits and being like canonized in a particular error. I think It's timeless, timeless, and that's where that's what I want to be.

spk_0:   27:49
That's where I want to be, too. And I think one of the baby phase moments that really exemplify that was at the end. Okay, so you remember. I think Instagram ended because of whatever I think and then teddy game bank on. But then Babyface could enjoy. They end up doing their own separate feeds after all of that. And Baby Face just gives like a beautiful just speech about, like, we're getting at this, get through this together and then he does this. I've never heard this before, and I truly, literally fell to the floor when I heard it. Did you? I did. I did. I truly did, because it was just like I've never thought of these two songs, even going together. And then it was the way he mix it. It was seamless. And then the message under that in terms of like, really getting to the core of what he's trying to achieve in music with his music. It's He started out with Count on Me with Whitney and C. C. Winans and then mixed into um when you believe, which is Whitney and Mariah Carey, and it was seamless and it was just so hopeful. And I was just was like, Oh, and I switched over to Teddy Riley's right. Afterwards he was even when he was on a different vibe, his please playing. He was playing his plan, his hits. But like Baby, baby Face came to like up Lift us, you know, And I felt that. I

spk_1:   29:14
mean, that's what I I I don't achieve this all the time. I strive for that in how I move through the world and like trying to just understand things at the foundation. You know, like that at its core. What what exactly makes this thing tick on? How can I then modify it the way I would like, you know? And I'm so in my new job. I'm finding myself, like trying to apply that in my new job. Like what? What is it that makes his company tick? What is it like? What about my rule? Adds to that you know that fundamental value that we're providing, and it's I think it's a bit difficult, more difficult now because wait all remote so you don't have these conversations. Can't have these conversations everything. People as they are at the core of all these things I don't like human beings are the ones who are ensuring that other other reason why these companies exist in the first place. So I'm having a hard time hard time, but it's more difficult that way. I have you been in your old a bit longer than I have? Yeah, So I don't know how

spk_0:   30:36
I mean. And again, e, I would say in my role I've been Teddy Riley, China become, ah, baby phase in that Also going back to Teddy feeling like this was his moment and he had to prove himself. Um, I felt that way in my role to, and I missed the core principle the core thing that I was trying to get at, and I had to, like try and then fail and get feedback and, you know, reiterate I have grown so much in my role over the past year and 1/2 because of those failures and but also because of the generosity of the people who shared on a speed honest and timely feedback with me, so that I can then go back to the drawing board and, you know, do better next time. Based on my last performance review much,

spk_1:   31:22
baby, are you Are you good at getting negative feedback?

spk_0:   31:28
Yes. I was raised by a Jamaican woman. Absolutely. Uh,

spk_1:   31:37
eso on eso I Sometimes I have Ah, something I have a hard time. We're gonna try toe verbalize this in a way that makes sense. I am very open su negative. Constructive feedback If I think the other person is informed enough to give me that feet. Mm. And sometimes that could be difficult if the person giving you feedback is a from place of authority. But you feel like they're not informed enough.

spk_0:   32:12
Yeah, that happened to be at work all the time. At the end of the day, I have had to learn how to navigate that space. Because if you implement that person's feedback and then you fail, it's still your fault. So how do you go about getting on the path to success without ruffling feathers over here, but also like doing what you need to do and like it's it's a dance smile on their face and the one on ones and then go and do the work to get the information that they're lacking and then then present it back to them in a way that is not like, I mean again Julie as a black woman that is not threatening. It's truly a dance. I'm talking about different people, actually, an amazing manager. I love her and she's She's helped me navigate some of these like Kerry things, but it's hard because these people who do not have the information their pictures be so strong. You be like, um, based on what? Back there. Just like God told me he owe

spk_1:   33:16
you, let you watching that You like this things to them, explain something to you or convene an idea to you. Any thinking they

spk_0:   33:24
can impede more than me. What? Why?

spk_1:   33:28
So so far I have not had this issue at my job, your job. It's definitely not like my my director. I I love my director, my manager, and she's been I could have a couldn't have asked for of really a better manager in other situations where I feel like someone is like conveying talking to me, guttering him advice and I was like on I do not have the gift of its smiling in their face the slightest thing. My my entire facial expression changes.

spk_0:   34:00
Yes, you may not notice this, but you do it in like a really cute way. It's more. You're genuinely, profoundly confused. I am. I usually

spk_1:   34:08
have, like I've gone through all the answers in my hand, like wheat. What? How I don't know where that that facial thinking comes from, but it's like it's somebody. I stri struggled some things a bit more challenging. Now that we're working from home and Corbett emotions are running high, people are stressed. Have you found it more difficult to manage feedback or even provide feedback to people in in this situation? And how are you dealing with that?

spk_0:   34:44
Yeah, and this is what this goes back to my manager being so great. She's somebody who really leads with her heart, and that is aligned. How I am, too. So she's really modeled giving feedback in a constructive, constructive way, but with empathy taking into consideration. Maybe maybe you didn't fully understand, or maybe you didn't have enough context. So this is not about you just being awful. This is what I think you need to do to bring this from like good to great or from, like, terrible toe like Okay, depending on where we are because she's modeled that for me, it's been easier for me to actually navigate it now, and that's why I appreciate her so much. But she, like, lay that foundation. So I work with other leaders. I often them asked to give feedback to you on. I'm able to use some of her tools, and just because it's it's about from what I've seen, giving feedback with empathy is trying to at least understand that person's world and then also give them space to talk about what's going on in their world. So I have feedback, but like what's happening on your end? This is what I've seen here is your opportunity. Also, give me input and let's come up with a plan together. It's I couldn't tell anybody what to dio too low, even though I'm there to, like advise at times. But I think I've I've seen that that has been more well received because people like Oh, Sasha really cares about me. She cares about what I'm going through, and she wants me to be successful. She's on my side basically

spk_1:   36:24
and he has a big part of effective communication in general, where you position yourself in the shoes of the receiver or the person communicating with and not just spewing information at them, ignoring who they are and their situation. Because then you could package it in a way that actually gets the point across there times when someone's talking to me. And maybe I'm just overly sensitive about this kind of stuff. But if I feel like someone is not, is like just presenting information to me without being aware of who I am or like, why I'm doing things, the current mindset, situation I'm in. I just locked out just like a shut off you. Don't you just want to show me that you know something? Your goal isn't actually help me improve. Your goal is to show me that you know something and I don't care. That's beyond the scope of my value system. So but being empathetic is, I think is very important regardless of its if it's positive, negative feedback, whatever. And not

spk_0:   37:30
everyone has its kill. No, no. Everyone has this girl lost me. Not everyone does. You can't give feedback in the same way to everybody. But if you're leading with empathy, your get your your taking the time to to get enough information to figure out the context to then as you said package it, taylor it exactly for the person you're trying to deliver it to so that it lands.

spk_1:   37:56
I'm not a particularly ex sensitive emotional person when it comes to that stuff, because I prefer when feedback is direct, like I don't I don't need the fluff. But I do want to know or feel that you know who I am and what exactly know, and then and then you could go straight to the point. You know, tell me it's bad. Whatever I could, I could, I could I could do with that. But if it's just a matter of like, you just like spewing information, I cannot be bothered.

spk_0:   38:23
Cannot be by Maybe

spk_1:   38:24
I can be on the scope of my value

spk_0:   38:27
system, and and I also think that feedback needs to be actionable in that it's you. If you're giving well, it depends. It depends on the relationship truly. But what I appreciate about my manager and the way she gives feedback is that they're like actionable steps. The vision is so clear. The bar, like what is successful and actually my manager before this, when I was at a school for a year, was very good at that, too. Like this is what the bar is. If you If you tell me if you show me what excellence is, I can get there. Right? But if I If if the vision is hazy, I don't get it, Um, And my managers just so clear. This is the bar. You are here. This is what you need to do to get from here to there and then run with it.

spk_1:   39:12
The gap between the here and there between Sasha's hands. Oh, very wise.

spk_0:   39:15
Older. So the whole world do

spk_1:   39:21
you think this

spk_0:   39:22
is the bar? The

spk_1:   39:24
bar is the third floor in this building. Yes, you are in the subway, right?

spk_0:   39:30
I am NBC. But you can get there. But then, But then when you reached the third floor from the subway and you look back down and you're like, Look, why did he can feel so good? And that's why I love my manager so much. I'm just like I can achieve. I can do I could do Well, I can thrive. I'm And you helped me get here.

spk_1:   39:51
So I have a question for you about your manager and some of the goals that we discuss in last podcast. How does she feel about breaks and how dish, huh? How how did you do it? Ah. Breaks over the last week.

spk_0:   40:12
Over the last week, I I think I took a nap yesterday. FL could, but I really haven't been taking breaks, but were welcome to take breaks. And she's very They're very he accepting of it. My pressure to not take a break is not coming from her. It's coming from me wanting to keep up with everybody else. They've made it very clear that, like, if I need time, I could take it. But, uh, Dr Peters, I believe you did take a

spk_1:   40:39
break. I took a break. So what?

spk_0:   40:43
Um, let's talk about it because I mean, I've heard from a lot of people at work and outside of work, I really feel like I need some time. There's a lot going on, and yes, I know I'm working from home, but, like, how do I How do I ask for time. I need time to process. But you did that.

spk_1:   40:59
I did. I did. I did. I don't know why I said that so many times.

spk_0:   41:04
It is an accomplished.

spk_1:   41:06
So I took Friday off and Monday off for a few reasons. I've been working on the sexual hours and to take the time back, whatever. It felt weird. It felt you're really weird. Especially like creating that 40 weekend. Where I So Thursday, Thursday, I was freaking out, but it was a lot to do because I Oh, my God, I'm not going to go back in the office until Tuesday. Any to tie up all the ends and make all these notes for people to, like, continue doing what I was doing. But on Friday, I was so happy that I took that time off Friday. Just felt like I reset on. And so I took Friday off on Friday. I went for a run. We had dinner. Um, and then that was my date. That I But I'm not gonna lie, though by Monday, I mean, you saw these

spk_0:   42:05
guys. Okay, You have the last time I told you that Sean just likes to work. I can't help myself. He can't help himself. So Sunday morning I woke up, but I'm hearing some, like Splish splashing happening outside. And I'm like Sean, cleaning at like nine in the morning on a Sunday, rolled over, went back to sleep, came back out later, probably closer like three PM, And Sean had mopped the floor but was not happy with it because he wanted to, like, really get a deep clean in. No, my Go get cool. Fine. Great. Monday was an afternoon. This is supposed to be here

spk_1:   42:46
every afternoon,

spk_0:   42:47
Supposed to be his day off. I come outside, he's on his hands and knees, scrubbing the floor like Cinderella, and I'm just like, Yo, this man just really likes toe work. I know Is that

spk_1:   43:00
so? I saw. I saw it happening. I saw myself ruining my day off. So it happening. But I felt like I needed to do it. I need it. So it's This is something that's been on my mind for a while. For many, many, many moons.

spk_0:   43:20
Many moon

spk_1:   43:21
Yeah, maybe like once. That sounded too like pedestrian.

spk_0:   43:26
Yes, it was like destined to be

spk_1:   43:29
Yeah, I think many moons

spk_0:   43:31
written in the

spk_1:   43:31
stars have been watching this floor. Soliven floor. We have hardwood floors in the room, but like some I don't know what's going on. Like a spirit has taken over them. And And I didn't like I didn't like what they're looking. So I decided that, you know, I would spend some time on Monday scrubbing them a bit and

spk_0:   43:55
wait, Guys, I will spend some time on Mondays scrubbing them a bit. Who says that? Is that normal? No. Like

spk_1:   44:06
I have. I have some time. I go. I didn't give myself, Uh, did appeared like, You know, I'm going to do this foot someone the time. And if whatever where I get to in that time, I'm gonna stop Billy the quarter off the floor. I think I got tired because a lot of scrubbing, but I did. I did stop. I did stop and I did Had half a moment of reflection thinking, Sean, this really was not that important view Did like, as you said, he kept saying to me, You're like ruining your day off.

spk_0:   44:41
Just could not believe it. Of all the things of all the things and all of the things. If I picked up the clothes off my floor on my day off, I'd be like jobs. Sasha, you get a girl?

spk_1:   44:56
No, I I You're right. You're right. You're right. Sometimes sometimes I can go and to this goes back to I think a second park motivation like that and rest. I like if you don't have some of the check you. Yeah, that is what That is what that looks like when I remember saying it's like, Oh, you know, it's it's not gonna be You said, Is this fun? Like knows I'm gonna be fun, but it's gonna be rewarding. Yes, he did. But if I had some, if I had, like, someone, you try to help me. But that's what happens when you you're so internally motivated that it doesn't matter if you can go right. It doesn't matter what anyone else is saying to you, or I tell me like you know, that doesn't make any sense. No. Sit down. Sit down, Down.

spk_0:   45:56
I just remember that were in the house alone together. No one's coming over. Julie is no external. Motivated me to scrub the floor, Obama or Beyonce. Mariah would have to becoming here

spk_1:   46:13
literally. No one will be coming here for months. But I just felt like a really needed to scrub the floor. My lord. And Sasha really doesn't care. Like I remember the last month or so. However long we've been in quarantine, I think I've pointed out, See, Like he knew the floor is dark in here. It was like,

spk_0:   46:32
Yeah, yes, it So my eyes at one time Don't you see it, woman? It's It's appalling. And I saw it. I was just second floors Do that.

spk_1:   46:46
So I am going to continue.

spk_0:   46:49
Are you going to do it again? I'm going to continue cause I started.

spk_1:   46:52
I've only 1/4 of it. I'm going to continue in little batches over the next, like, 70 years.

spk_0:   46:58
Someone send Sean some help and

spk_1:   47:00
someone come clean My floors.

spk_0:   47:01
Oh, wait. No, no, you can't.

spk_1:   47:03
Okay. No, you can't come

spk_0:   47:04
unless you Babyface you can come.

spk_1:   47:06
Okay. Can think this big

spk_0:   47:07
basin for no, But I do for for him. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Wait. What?

spk_1:   47:13
His one of the mean?

spk_0:   47:15
No, I was just thinking about my mom

spk_1:   47:16
way anyway. So if you need me, the Holy Ghost Holy Ghost power. Okay, so last week we talked about taking breaks as a strategy for for working from home to that I want to bring up today I leaving home. Okay. All right. You go do that. Okay. Not hesitating to ask what you need, okay? Yes. How do you How do you feel about those things?

spk_0:   47:55
So, you know I don't leave home, Sean. Sean taught me new thing, though. Your people are outside when it's raining. So I've learned that that's when I should go do my like, Aaron. So I have to run to, like, write eight. Or if I have to run Teoh Best Buy

spk_1:   48:13
have you done? That

spk_0:   48:14
is not best buy, but, uh, supermarket, Um, this market best market. But once I we tried to do it, the rain, like decided to delete CPC and showed up while we were in line t the supermarket. But yet my exactly my anxiety over, like social distancing and the fact that that is a group project and we as human and just humans really bad accrued project because I can't control people. They can't move them all six feet away from me. I say you have

spk_1:   48:48
no control over that. You really don't.

spk_0:   48:50
I know, But I just think at this point in, like humanity, our existences, humans, we can't figure out how to be six feet away from each other at all times.

spk_1:   49:00
When would you be comfortable with going outside again?

spk_0:   49:04
I cannot tell you.

spk_1:   49:06
That's a heavy question. I'm sorry. That's like,

spk_0:   49:07
Honestly, that's something that gives me a lot of anxiety because the subways, I mean, how did you talk about this? How do you social distance on the subway, You can get one step and it's fine. You hit 42nd Street. What do you do?

spk_1:   49:23
You You cry in a corner.

spk_0:   49:25
I would be screaming. I am practicing social distancing as I walk out. And I would probably wearing a HAZ mat suit because

spk_1:   49:35
if you asked me four weeks ago, if, like when I feel comfortable going back out on the subway, I think I would have said, Oh, in two weeks, I should be OK now. I'm like, Ah, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I really don't honestly do not know, but it's gonna happen. Um, are you get a loving but the idea of going back to work now is so It's so to me, going back to the office, I'm clearly working our butts off. But the idea of going back to work seems so strange to me right now. And ridiculous. Almost ridiculous. Yeah. I don't know what's what's gonna have toe happen for that. To change for that feeling, the change.

spk_0:   50:26
Yeah. And I think as we said, maybe in our first focus, what has really what I've really come to learn about this whole situation is that no one really knows what's happening. And they're learning more and more as we go along and even the country's have experienced, you know, severe outbreaks before us and are a little further along in the timeline are still like, you know, Do we do this? Do we do that like no one knows. So as much as I love Dr Fauci and am I and and them whoever else? Yeah. Thank you. If I've been able to do my work and you're happy with it, guess who's won't be home until fall 2022

spk_1:   51:10
s Are you Are you Are you willing to ask what you need when you if that were the case,

spk_0:   51:16
I yes, I think that 15 pretty they've been so supportive, super understanding. And I think also again because they know at first there people who were, like at work, who are like, Oh, you're young, you don't have to worry about it. But then again, is as it started to progress in in the U. S. We started to see younger people dying and like it was not predictable. Who was going to die and who's not. So then people were like, Oh, you you stay inside that house, girl like it comes out, it comes down to personal choice. So they've already said, like if and when? Well, when we're we're doubly going back at some point, it's gonna be a staggered optional approach to going back into the office for us.

spk_1:   51:56
So what are what are some ways that they've, like, support you guys in this whole working from home, where the things I have to ask for things they asked for and then you got it, or like, were they just, like, ahead of the game the entire time? And you just always had what you needed.

spk_0:   52:11
They sent us office supply so screens and, ah, mount A my mouse mice, a mouse and a keyboard. Um, but they've been very clear you could not buy furniture to work from home because you're coming back. You know, just if you need time to expend the extended like an administrative leave. So if you need to take care of people, I think they call it carers. Leave something like that. They extended. That's you get a longer period of time that you can get paid for if you need to take care of things. And just in general, like in a given day, if you need to pull back, you just reach out to your manager and you can pull back. But what about you? Do you feel like you were supported? You have the things that you needed? Well, you did a lot of great stuff to transit to pivot in this moment.

spk_1:   52:56
My company is very mindful of the fact that we're human beings going through this on, and but we don't have as many. Resource is Fashion resource is too likes and equipment to people whatever, but they make it very known that if there's anything that we think we need we should definitely speak up and ask for it when things I really appreciate about them was that giving us like these additional days off.

spk_0:   53:21
Wait, we go into that? What? What? What's the policy

spk_1:   53:24
official in March? You seem like you have additional much what month we and we're now in what additional two PTO outside of your regular days off, or whatever that you can use to do whatever you want. It do do with it if it means just need some time to do laundry because your kids are now wherever you just He's a self care day, Whatever use it however you want. And I think also the conversations with my direct have been very helpful. When we when we meet, she acknowledges my humanity, that has been helpful. It helps her know where I am mentally. Then we can adjust workload or responsibilities or timelines or whatever where possible. Some things you can't change, like the course is still have to start at these dates. The university is still expected to deliver these things, but there's other things that we could move around too meek that time less stressful.

spk_0:   54:23
Sean, you and I and we I mean, we know this. We're incredibly blessed to be in situations where we feel supported by our jobs. I hope you know, a lot of our listeners feel that way as well, you know, like they're supported. But I can imagine that there are situations where people do not feel that way. Not that there's anything that we we can do about that, but just acknowledge it like, you know, this is we're very fortunate.

spk_1:   54:53
So So this episodes that's gonna air in about a week after the teddy versus Babyface situation on. And but we would still love to get your input on future topics a lot. Here, let's talk about I could go on for these Oh, things that you know that affect us. But we will continue to. We love to continue hearing from you all. About what? What? What's your experience like going through Kobe and working from home? I know you've been I think he seems to be more committed with your friends in talking about what this podcast has been about so far.

spk_0:   55:38
I'm getting blown away by how great great they've been. But I'm I'm particularly interested in hearing, obviously people who feel they can relate to our experiences but also want to hear from people who feel like, Yeah, that's great that that's how you guys feel. But actually, my expense is completely different because they, you know, we're sharing our experiences, but we're not sharing them as the Keurig, you know, work from home experience. Well,

spk_1:   56:05
that's true. Like we're we're not. We're not an authority on Corbett working from home situations.

spk_0:   56:10
Nobody is. I don't care. Needing Beyonce. I mean, maybe

spk_1:   56:19
I I I, um I really want I really want to have either. Beyonce's, um Serena Williams. Oh, baby face really show up likes and talk with us.

spk_0:   56:39
Yes, one not beyonc. Talk to get my nails done, though. But, baby face, you cut through a wheat. Didn't one of your friends send you? Yes, that's another good thing about the pipe. Gas is again because people really listened. Um, and I would like to share this with the listeners as well. One of my friends pointed out that popping off her nails and re gluing them It's just a very sad situation. It might not be the most hygienic thing you do is you. Yeah, not good and she so graciously sent me a website that does press on nails. Eso my set should be arriving in 2 to 3 weeks. Really tell you Cove it effects every supply jdc, and there's no way that the gems are popping off. I mean, it's just generally

spk_1:   57:32
lease of your worry. Sasha. You literally, like, be like at the edge.

spk_0:   57:38
They're not Theo. Um, no. There. Yes, there's a There's a good weight. How much? How much space is that?

spk_1:   57:50
About 1/4 of an inch,

spk_0:   57:52
1/4 of an inch of new growth. As Regina Hollis said tonight, we are all struggling way. We don't have the things that we

spk_1:   57:59
need. When you sat quoting a comedian, that's when you know science. Wrap up, folks. Thank you so much for joining us

spk_0:   58:09
today, and

spk_1:   58:10
we'll be back again next week for another episode of Working Home with Sean and Sasha.

spk_0:   58:16
Bye guys.